“Don’t say the first thing that pops into your head”
Received this advice from everyone for as long as I can remember.
Controlling yourself from putting words to every thought is good. That’s because most people never train their minds and live at the whim of their monkey brain.
I have come to realize it is at best a short-term solution to a much more complicated problem.
If you don’t give in to the urge of saying something negative, it won’t go out in the world but it will continue to exist in your mind.
My yoga teacher would always ask me — why do you think that way?
After all, the purpose of yoga isn’t to do 100 sun salutations, but to have a mind without fluctuations.
Often if it was a thought that was generating emotions such as anger, grief, and sadness or even happiness and euphoria. So anything that could unleash my monkey brain had to be addressed.
I remember a week when my only homework was to break down every thought, and every emotion. It was challenging, but seeing the results of deep contemplation for only one week, encouraged me to develop it as a habit.
The actual “cause” however ugly or embarrassing or hurtful — was always easier to confront than to carry a negative emotion for the rest of my life
Most times it was an experience as a child that was never addressed or a belief ingrained via outside influence that was never questioned.
I learned that what I really need to do is to train my mind such that it doesn’t generate any negative thoughts.
Think about this. You grow up in a fairly homogeneous community where using a certain racial slur is considered harmless. You end up moving to a bigger diverse city where you not only learn to stop using that word but also “why” it is biased, ignorant, and completely inappropriate.
Since now you know better, your mind no longer produces any such thought.
Simply said, putting the filter at the very beginning of the thought process versus the end.
Comments